Shabana Missing Mother: The Actress Speaks For The First Time After Mom’s Death

 It’s been less than a month when Shabana Azmi and her cinematographer-brother  Baba  lost their  mother the iconic Shaukat Kaifi.

 Her reveberant laughter  is still alive   for those who loved her.

The still-grieving Shabana admits she has yet to come  to terms  with  her mother’s death. “Kehneko kuch bhi nahi hai aur bahut kuch hai bhi .I’m taking one day at a time and going with the flow. There is a deep sadness that will need to be pulled away layer by layer and that will take time .. perhaps months , perhaps years, perhaps never .”

Remembering her mother who was a  matriarch to all she  loved , Shabana says, “She was remarkable in many ways . She always  chose her  own path, and  though she continued to be her own person all her life, she  never faltered as a wife , mother or housekeeper.”

 In  Shaukat Aapa(as she was affectionately known throughout the  film industry)  Shabana sees a majestic  merger  of  tradition and  progress. “The traditional and the modern were perfectly balanced  in her personality.My relationship with Abba (father Kaifi Azmi) has always been the more celebrated one.But both my brother   Baba and I have been deeply connected to mum too. In the last couple of years the roles had reversed and she had become my child .Her presence in the house was hugely comforting.”

 And  now  Shabana must come  to terms  with  the realization that  she will never see the mother whom she mothered during her last years.

Says Shabana, “Recently when I left for Budapest at 2 am it was the first time ever that I didn’t go in to Mum’s room to wish her Khuda Hafiz.The changes have begun ..As my husband Javed Ahtarwrote, “Raahi jab duur tak kahin saaya na paayega/Yeh aakhri darakht bahut yaad aayega .”

Ameen to that.