The New Spiderman Film Is Dreadfully Jejune

Spiderman: Far From Home

Starring Tom Holland,  Zendaya, Samuel L Jackson, Jake Gyllenhaal

Directed  by  Jon Watts

Rating: **(2 stars)

There  is a  pinnacled  problem with  the torrent of super-hero films. They have all become an inhouse secret , rituals of a rollicking adventure  attended by a global community of  superhero-philes who  know every  joke, gag, gig and  gurgle that  belches out  of the smoking-hot  edifice.

Even by the  casual expectations of Marvel-hero fans, Spiderman: Far From Home  is a tepid  occurrence, more  mentionable for  its familiar tropes and characters than any real attempt to crack the superhero code. Not that  the audiences wants it cracked. They are happy to watch the caped crusaders  flying high on  anti-destruction dope.

Spiderman ,as we all know, is the youngest  and most boyish  of the superhero recruits. As played by the  ceaselessly-wonderstruck(Wonderman?)  Tom Halland, the ingénue act never  leaves  Spiderman behind. More than  saving the world from catastrophe, Spiderman needs to understand what he is up for. But when the material  provided to the  ingénue  is  so slim and  brittle that he has  nothing to hold on to except his wits, then the whole existential  question goes flying(in more than one) out of  the window.

 There isn’t much flying for  silly Spidy to do this time. Yes, towards the beginning he flies(in  a plane, though)  to Europe for a  vacation with his  friends including Michelle(Zendaya) whom Spiderman  loves in  a silent way. Meaning,  he  goes into the  flight’s washroom to freshen up for her. By the time he comes out she is gone , presumably into the adjacent  washroom leaving our young hero royally pissed off.

Such is  life. And  such is quality of the jejune life shown in a  film where all the water of Venice  rises in revolt in a not-very-impressive display of aqueous majesty.(Warning  : I saw  the  film in 2D, can’t  bear 3D).

 Spiderman is on vacation. But his  astute aunt(Marise Tomei,  please  give us more of  her next take, ok?) packs his superhero costume ,hence Venice is saved from a watery  catastrophe.

(Question:  is  super-hero activity annulled without the costume ?).

There are distinguished actors making assemblyline appearances. It’s  infuriating to see  the magical  JakeGyllenhaal  flit in and  out without   any  substantial control over his character’s karma.  Come  to think of it,  a lot of times during the narrative’s wobbly  progression I felt a complete lack  of  scriptural support. Or maybe there were too many scriptwriters hovering anxiously over the  proceedings  trying to justify their pay cheques ending up doing nothing.

A  lot of the footage  is  squandered  in  highschool banter as  Parker and his  best friend Ned(Jacob Batalon)  try to grow out of  delayed puberty. The film, alas, never seems to get out of its  boyhood zone,give or take the  hood.

This one  Capes  it  simple. Really simple.