Jumanji 2 Movie Review: It Is Adventure For Morons!
Starring: Dwayne Johnson, Jack Black, Kevin Hart, Karen Gillan
Directed by Jake Kasdan
Rating: 0 stars
This has got to be the most cretinous and annoying film of 2017. That it is raking in the greenbacks just goes to show that the taste of moviegoers everywhere has degenerated to a sacrilegious low. Never have cinematics aesthetic hit rockbottom with such a thud.
Jumanji 2 is the Golmaal of American entertainment with Dwayne Jonhson sportingly indulging in the team spirit with the less known actors.Sadly Dwayne can’t act.
Not that the film requires anything more than Mr Johnson muscle power. It is crass and pointless to the degree you question that financial resources and the intellectual faculties of the studio that backs such poop-in-cinema.
I’ve a seldom seen more intellectually backrupt offering thanJumanji 2.It’s got a bunch of complete non-actors pretending to have fun as they enter the world of a video game with no idea of what lies in store.
I suspect the script writers too are clueless as to where they should go with this muck-spilling adventure saga where everything that glitters is old. Weathern-worn clichés about youngsters acquiring a sudden transformation of body and even gender swarm the film like flies hovering over a basket of sweets.
One of the films’s dimwitted squad of heroes transform from a phone-obsessed female teenager into a middleaged man. This gives the narrative an occasion to indulge in a train of penis jokes which are as tiresome for us to see as they must have been for the film’s principal actors to perform.
Everyone acts as though his or her life depended on it.The special effects guys have an orgy at the producers’ expense. The stunts are absurdly over-the-top. In one chase sequence the protagonists flee on a helicopter while they are hunted down by a bunch of rhinos. We could easily make out that plane was ‘flying’ on the studio floor. The action is so tackily done it makes our Baahubali look like a David Lean film.
The film is shot in an Amazonian greenspace where the actors get to speak the most preposterous lines with a conviction that comes naturally when you know you are not being judged . This film is purely for a juvenile viewership. I strongly recommend a ban on such cheap imported films that serve no purpose except to make the audience feel intellectually superior to the material being served up.
Save yourself the torture. Just avoid.
